Kiss Insecurity Goodbye By Alice N. Daniels If living with insecurity for so long has made it seem like an old friend, a new book by Beth Moore promises ways to permanently bid it adieu! Beth Moore and insecurity? This is not a word that most would dream of connecting to the woman who is known as a renowned Bible teacher, popular conference speaker, and author of numerous Bible studies. Add to that the fact that she is an intelligent, beautiful, vivacious blonde who’s both articulate and funny; most women would say, “No way!” Yet, Beth Moore says of her new book, So Long, Insecurity, You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us (February, 2010, Tyndale House), that writing this book is “the closest I’ll ever come to an autobiography. My entire life story grows like a wild shoot from the thorny soil of insecurity. Every fear I’ve faced, every addiction I’ve nursed, every disastrous relationship and idiotic decision I’ve made has wormed its way out of the sorrowfully fertile ground.” S urprised? Well, according to Beth, you shouldn’t be. “Insecurity among women is epidemic.” She should know, as she surveyed and heard from more than 1,200 of them as she researched this book. The good news, though, is that while insecurity seems to be epidemic, Beth assures that it is not incurable. Getting over it and finding authentic security is what this book is all about. Though her book was written primarily for women, Beth says that men, too, suffer from insecurity, so she has a chapter that is directed specifically to men’s struggles—appearance, fear of failure, and nee to feel loved and appreciated. “Their challenges are very real and very intense,” says Beth. “The need to prove themselves as men and providers is pretty daunting, especially in these unstable financial times.” The heart and soul of the book, though, is Beth’s desire to help women. “God was pounding a passion in my heart to see Him free women from the epidemic insecurity our culture keeps whipping up,” she says. I n addition, Beth adds, “God went out of His way to trip every single insecurity switch I had and to make the pursuit so personal to me that I’d be willing to do virtually anything for freedom. This book became the result.” Beth’s passion in life is to see women freed to love Christ and His Word and to live out the abundant effective life He has planned for them. She became increasingly convinced over the years that insecurity was the greatest issue ensnaring women. “I think the constant barrage of media images is primarily to blame for turning an age-old problem into an epidemic stronghold,” states Beth. “Since it’s probably not going to change, it’s up to us to change.” Beth looked back over the course of her life and saw how almost every wonderful season, circumstance, or opportunity was somehow tainted by self-doubt or even self-torment. Like most women, she had dealt with insecurity all her life, which is one of the reasons she chose the words “so long” for the title. “I thought, Why are you still dealing with this? Did Christ come to set you free or not? Is this the one exception?” Beth could see how every area of defeat in her life sprang from the common denominator of insecurity. She was fearful as a child and fraught with a prevailing sense of inferiority. Like most people, her insecurities came from a concoction of things. She grew up to be sanguine and outgoing and learned how to keep most of her insecurity well hidden. “I didn’t start really owning my insecurity publicly until the last five or ten years,” she states. “Then I began to see so many women resonate and relate that I knew it was pretty chronic for all of us. At that point, these women became worth the humiliation of admitting to it.” So Long, Insecurity addresses the roots of women’s insecurity, including instability in the home, significant loss, dramatic change, personal limitations, and personal dispositions. The book also discusses two major life sources of insecurity: culture and pride. M ore than any other time in history, our culture has access to myriad instant media images that bombard us with its worship of youth and outer beauty. “We honestly talk ourselves into believing that media princesses are the norm and that we are the pathetic few in the entire universe who can’t keep up,” says Beth. O ur own pride can bind us in insecurity when we realize we’re not the most gifted, the first choice, or the favorite, and we can’t do everything ourselves, aren’t somebody’s top priority, aren’t paid what we’re worth, or aren’t paid at all. All these insecurities become debilitating when they keep us from the full enjoyment and embodiment of abundant life in Christ; when they undercut our decisions and undermine our willingness and freedom to do the will of God; or when we can’t get enough from people and can’t ever quite discover contentment and peace. Scattered throughout the book are alternately hilarious and heartbreaking anecdotes from real women who have let insecurity—about weight, physical features, past abuse, family position, men, work, and more—make fools of them. In the words of some of the women who responded to Beth’s survey: “My insecurities increased tenfold when I became a parent—I had such a harsh upbringing, I knew I would turn out to be like my parents.” “Insecurity has caused me to lie more times than I can count.” “Nothing I ever did satisfied my mother.” “Insecurity has made me do things that were dead wrong.” “Images of my foolish, disgusting, embarrassing, sinful behavior flood my mind, and my stomach turns.” “I often wish life had an eraser.” “Insecurity has crippled me to where I doubted if God loves me anymore.” However, amid the mire of insecurity, Beth firmly believes there is hope in Christ. He is the way out of that pit. “Lord have mercy, if Jesus didn’t come to bring security to those who’d receive it, what on earth did He come for? “ Beth asks. “Security is part of our salvation. It is our right as sons and daughters of God to be—and feel—secure. Not arrogant. Not proud. Secure. The Bible has so much to say about the subject. Psalm 20:1 says: ‘May the Lord answer you when you are in trouble; may the God of Jacob make you secure!’” P lacing our fears and anxieties before the Lord, walking consistently with Him, and immersing ourselves in His Word are keys to recovering from the ugly battles with insecurity. We must hang onto what we know, rather than what we feel. We must walk by faith, rather than by sight, and recognize that insecurity is a lie about our God-sanctioned condition. It is possible for believers to choose not to let the slings and arrows of life to assault their security. As children of God, when we allow the Holy Spirit to work within us and enable us to do what we by ourselves can’t, we can be hurt, disappointed, shocked, humbled, and unsure. As Proverbs 3:26 says, “The Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap.” The message of So Long, Insecurity is that no matter the origin, strength, or longevity of our insecurities, God in His mercy provides relief and deliverance. In Christ, there truly is hope, which is borne out by some of the women’s answers: “Thankfully, the Lord is faithful and patient with me; He is the only way I am able to get through it.” “A huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.” “God truly saved me, and I am now a miracle of His.” “I got help, and I am now the best mom I can possibly be with the Lord standing beside me.” “Praise the Lord for His mercy being new every morning!” “Thank you, Jesus, for rescuing me!” Beth says, “My hopes and prayers for So Long, Insecurity are that insecure women will open the book and secure women will close the book . . . and all because of one beautiful Savior!” Beth will be holding an open, online study of So Long, Insecurity, beginning in February 2010, on her blog at www.livingproofministries.blogspot.com.